I'm Ok

Just a little shooken up.

A guy wanted a refund, and I kept explaining to him why he couldn't get one.  He started getting pretty upset, yelling and screaming, and I asked him to leave.  When he didn't I reached for the phone to call the police, but he entered the office.

Before I could react he had me in a headlock.  At this point instinct just took over and I pushed backwards until we were both out of the office, and I bit his arm while tripping him.  We fell backwards with me on top of him, and I think I hit him in the face and he let go, where I ran out of there to a store across the street and called the police.

Afterwards, I cautiously made my way back to the hotel and saw that he had left.  Didn't seem like he took anything- even my laptop was safe and sound on the desk.  Guess he didn't want to add robbery or destruction of property to his charges.

It's all just made me think, though.  This really is a dangerous neighborhood.  I get death threats all the time, and I've just tried to do my job as best as possible and carry on.  But I'm not safe, not really.  That guy could easily come back to finish the job, or maybe I'll get a bullet in the back sometime in the future while I'm walking down the street.

I'm going to use this incident to get the boss to beef up security.  I've been telling him for months we should get a better camera surveillance system, and maybe some bullet resistant glass for the office.

Myself, I'm thinking about maybe getting a bullet-proof vest.  Found some good deals online.  It's not much, but it's something.

I'm also rethinking my priorities.  I do have a pretty good gig here.  I make a pretty good amount for someone who only has a GED.  I live rent-free in one of the countries most expensive cities.  I couldn't imagine taking some McJob somewhere where I'm just a cog in the corporate machine, rather then a small little place where I only have one boss to answer to.

But is it worth it?  Worth my life?  Well, no, obviously.  But really, there's no guarantee of safety anywhere.  This was the first time something like this has happened in the 30 year history of this hotel, and though you hear about tragedies all the time like the convenience store clerk killed for $50 bucks, statistically it's still a rather low probability.

Of course, when it happens to you, statistics don't mean squat.

When the guy first grabbed me, I remember there was a split second there where I thought I was about to die.  That maybe he was getting ready to knife me or strangle me to death.

And as statistically low as it may be, it does happen.

It makes you rethink priorities.  I guess what I'm saying is, should I pack up and go because of the possibility it might happen again, or should I just carry on?

Well, I'm going to stay at least until I get back from Thailand.  And I want to save up enough to last me for awhile.  I'd hate to have to start over with nothing again after four years of building.

Ugh, well, just more things to think about.  I'm sure this is mostly just nerves talking.  And it's true what they say, I think- Once a smoker, always a smoker.  First thing I did after I filed the police report was buying a pack of cigarettes.  They did help to take the edge off.

I got someone to fill in for me and I'm taking the rest of the weekend off.  And I didn't forget about the Cuddle Party story.  That was still an experience that I'd like to record, so assuming I survive long enough, I'll blog about that next entry.